Thursday, September 22, 2011

I Feel A Rant Coming On

As a general rule I try to limit my posts on this blog to my life and excursions on the farm. Animals, kids, gardening, cooking and canning. These skills and the relationships with my family are the things that fill my day. However, in recent days I have had a subject come up repeatedly that I just feel the need to voice. Several days ago I got a call from a dear friend that I have known since second grade. She and I were thicker than thieves in grade school and high school. She was maid of honor in my wedding and I in hers. The short is we have been together forever. Recently after having raised both of her children to adulthood she and her husband have purchased a cabin up in the mountains of Tennessee. With a masters in education she continues to work but is now enjoying her years together with just she and her husband. We conversed for quite awhile catching up on each others children and grandchildren, parents and siblings. But the part of our conversation that stuck with me was that she complained since buying her new house in the mountains of being isolated because she couldn't get Facebook or cell phone reception at her new home. I immediately remembered the days when we were both young mothers living half way across the country from one another sending funny postcards to each other.

 When was the last time you got a postcard? Or sent one?

 I remembered the fun we had writing letters and sending pictures of our kids back and forth and the joy of opening that mailbox and hanging on her every word. When did our connection to the outside world become exclusively linked to Facebook or a cell phone?

My next encounter with this subject was with my son, the youngest of three, who is still single. In his early thirties and out there in the dating circles. He called for my birthday and when I asked about dating he complained  of being unable to find a date that wanted to actually spend time with him and not be on the cell phone during dinner, the movies or any other time they were together. Who was constantly taking pictures during their dates with their phone and sending them to her girlfriends via her phone. AT the end of dates you can always go to her Facebook page and find an evaluation of the date...his kissing skills...or their entire private conversations out there for the world to read. And even a rating of their date from one to ten.

Wow no pressure there, I sure am glad I am married!

My next encounter was actually on my Facebook page where I logged on for the first time in 2 weeks to individually thank all those who took the time to wish me a Happy Birthday. One of the first posts that I encounter is from a dear friend of many years who is also a double PhD instructor at a major state university. This was her post to all her friends and students on her page:

To all my friends, a little warning from a conference I was at last week...when you post on Facebook, 4 copies are made of every post. These will never ever go away. Employers DO READ FACEBOOK and other Social Media before they even consider an applicant or an interview. Be sure to remind all of your students, your friends and family of this because their future may be directly impacted by one or two statements or pictures.

At the risk of sounding like my mother:

a.) if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all.
b.) if you can't say something to a person's face maybe it just doesn't need to be said AT ALL

This issue just keeps raising it's ugly head. Yesterday I read a blog of a blogger friend who talks of her depression and contributed some to Facebook and her seeking of acceptance or approval from people reading her posts.. Today I read of a wreck with two fatalities from someone driving and texting. And the list goes on. So I am making some statements to throw out there for thought. You don't have to agree with me. Just stop and think.

I have never had a phone conversation with anyone (text included) that is worth endangering the life of myself, my children or grandchildren riding with me and any other human being out there on the road with me. Turn the phone off my kids are out there on the road with you.

Turn off that phone or computer and take a walk, grow a garden or just hug your husband, boyfriend, dog or child. Do you really require being connected every minute of your waking hours.

I come from the old school in that what happens behind closed doors is private and not meant to be bandied about. I don't care to hear about your sex life, your underwear color, your bra size, penis size, bathroom habits or anything else along those lines. I find it offensive and embarrassing for both of us. Too much information. The list of people that I hide continues to grow : )

I am an old woman and there are very few people in this life that I seek acceptance and/or approval from other than my God and maybe my family, and very few of them are on Facebook.

Don't get me wrong I do go on Facebook at least once a week. I enjoy seeing my children's lives in pictures. I enjoy being a part of things. I enjoy visiting with my grandchildren. That cell phone has been a lifesaver for those flat tires and car breakdowns, checking on the teenager that is at home after school or calling from the hospital. It is a valuable tool in moderation.

But like everything else in life use it responsibly.

In the immortal words of my parents.

If you sweep around your own door and keep it clean you won't have time to sweep around anyone else's!

Blessings from The Holler

The Canned Quilter


  1. Amen Sister!
    My brother has something going on to do with texting which will maybe save lives as soon as he irons out some deals with investors. I think that its going to be great to have. I can't talk that much about it but its coming soon.

    We nearly wiped out a young driver the other day. She had a small sedan and ours is a large truck. She swerved in front of us and caught herself. My husband is a good defensive driver so he would of averted the accident on his own. We passed her up and she was so young and of course, texting.

    But before that came around, do you remember women putting on mascara? Or men looking at maps? Seems like it will always be something.

  2. I hear ya!! I used to be addicted to Facebook games. Until I realized what a waste of my life that was! It's not real. I take nothing away from it. If those games disappeared, what have I gained by playing them? Absolutely nothing but time that I will never get back. I have quite a few friends who are still addicted to games, and I just pray for the day they will come to the same realization, especially the moms with families to take care of. I don't even get to talk to these friends anymore on FB because they are too busy with 20 different games. Makes me so sad! (Some even have two accounts to play games.)

    I do like Facebook still, some days I can go on several times a day, but I only stay a few minutes. (I'm a homemaker.) I just hate how it's become 'life' for a lot of people.

    I don't have a cell phone. I'm sure it'd be nice to have, but I don't need it or the extra bill. I live on a busy street and sometimes I watch the cars go by and see how many people have a cellphone held up to their ear. The cell phone thing upsets me more than FB, because people are driving and could hit someone or something, causing injuries or death. We live in an area heavily populated by wildlife and you NEED to pay attention to the road extra carefully up here. I wish cell phones and texting were illegal while behind the wheel.

    I wish more people just used their common sense about these things! Whether it be cell phones, texting, FB, drinking and driving, flicking their cig butts out the window, eating, applying makeup, and the list goes on.

    On another note. I love to send and get postcards. My grandma used to send me them during their travels when they retired. They don't travel much anymore, but she makes sure to send my kids individual cards for most of the holidays. I still send birthday cards through mail. I love picking cards at the store. :)

  3. wow that comment ended up way longer than I thought. haha. sorry!

  4. Jessica, I'm not a troll, however I have to say that at times recently, Fakebook with some of its silly games has been something I can do from bed rather than watching tv.

    You see, I have cancer. Chemo has ravaged me and I'm only on the start of a long ass road to recovery. There are times when I cannot hold a pen to write. There are times I have been too weak to even hold a damn book to read. However I can lay here and at least click the mouse because I'm too weak to get off my lazy ass and take care of my family since I'm also a stay at home wife and mom.

    No, I don't live where I can have a real garden and even if I did, at this point in my life, it would be going to weeds because of a stupid illness I have been afflicted with for no good reason. No, we have no family around to help. My husband is trying to work fifty to sixty hours a week, take me to appointments in between trying to take care of 2/3 of our sons who are still in school. The oldest son is in the military a very far distance away.

    While I hate all the publicness of Fakebook for reasons The Canned Quilter mentioned, it can, on occasion, have its uses. Texting is great. Texting and driving is idiocy looking for a place to happen.

    Just tossing that out for you to ponder. =)

    And Canned Quilter--about your post--if there was a "Like" link, I'd click on it. <3

    (More people have commented on the iguana hat or are those chameleons? Lizards. They are lizards--people love that hat! Thank you again bunches and tons for the hats!)

  5. Amen!!!! I tried facebook, stopped it, same with twitter. There are just some things you don't talk about for the world to read.

    I have ditched my cell phone and rarely answer my house phone. My life would probably be much sweeter if I unhooked the tv and the computer and went about the business of living.

    Fantastic post!!!!!

  6. You tell 'em Momma! So true~ I've been thinking about your post all day!

  7. Some things don't belong on Fakebook, that is true. I absolutely agree with that.

    Have anyone had an immediate family member deployed to a foreign country where there are no regular telephones, much less cell phone towers? Sat phones don't work so great, either. Those are very unreliable.

    There were times when we lived to see a Fakebook post from our son who was deployed because he would have only enough time to make a random post before a connection was lost again for an indefinite amount of time.

    Fakebook was a good way for him to make an occasional post and know that other people he knew aside from us would know he was doing okay almost immediately after he posted.

    I cannot tell you how many military people my family has run across who have stated that Fakebook was THE only way they had any somewhat stable updates/contacts with family who was deployed to other parts of the world that aren't so civilized and/or technological.

    Do I dislike Fakebook and the idiocy that seems to go along with it since people don't seem to have much common sense these days? Sure. Like The Canned Quilter, I don't need to know someone's personal and private details which should be just that--kept personal and private, nor do I need to know about hoochies and notorious man whores. People like that are not on my list anyway.

    For me, it has had its uses between having a son who was formerly deployed and the idiotic cancer I have which I did not want, nor need, nor ask for.

    <3 and huge hugs to The Canned Quilter.


Feel free to challenge me, disagree with me, or tell me I’m completely nuts in the comments section of each blog entry, but I reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason whatsoever (abusive, profane, rude, or anonymous comments) – so keep it polite, please. Also I am not a free advertisement board if you want to push a product on my comments I will delete you fast !!!

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